Stalin eventually went on to a successful solo career.
However, the band broke over creative differences between Stalin and Trotsky. Lenin decided to overthrow the government of a country of Orthodox hicks to implement Marx's dream of communist bliss. Marx's dream was later picked up by the rock super group known as Lenin, Stalin and Trotsky (best known by the initials LS&T). Marx proposed that if everyone pretended to work and the government pretended to pay people, then pretty soon there would be nothing left to bitch about. Marx theorized that the ruling bourgeoisie 元37 controlled society by getting off their asses and not bitching so much about fingers lost in machine lathes and shit like that. The second, Das Kapital, outlined Marx's view of how the smell migrated from his crotch to his beard and eventually drove off all but the most offensive members of his social circle. It also inspired the Broadway play Les Misérables, but nobody cares about Broadway plays. The first of these was his "Communist Manifesto", written with the intention of destroying capitalism by inspiring middle-class white teens to dress funny and smoke marijuana during the best earning years of their lives.
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This inspired Marx to write a series of great texts that changed the world. You shall never be hungry again, comrade!Ĭommunism in its modern form appeared in the mid-19th century when a scholar named Karl Marx pulled a Cheeto out of his belly button and blamed the smell coming from his index finger on people more ambitious than himself. Main article: A brief history of facial hair (communism) in the 20th century Socialism has a slicker sound to it and is not extraneous (e.g. If you want it to work, then it's called socialism. Communism can earn your citizens bad names, like goddamn frickin' commies (bleedin' in Britain).
Fuck, I'm off track, well, communism is like extraneous equations those weird ones that make sense on paper but will give your calculator a "syntax error". The secret is to get the leaders so drunk that they do not know what is what then put a slip in front of them that says they will allow communism to become the one and only party there then you are all set. If you plan out how you are going to sell it might sometimes. Communism doesn't sell and will make your project fail (e.g., Soviet Union, China, the US Senate). The trick to getting communism working is all in the sales name. After God learned communism failed, he killed Saddam. But will God accept this defeat so easily? HELL NO. The plan that works on paper has spread quickly, but it soon became fricked up like everything else.
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Also of note is the remarkable ability of communists to not only survive, but thrive, entirely on vodka and radiation.Ĭommunists have recently established a party in Calamity Mod Wiki.Īccording to the Vatican, God created communism as a way to make an idea(l) society after he created Michael Jackson and Disneyland. This resulted into the end of Hegel's long line of philosophical insanity, and in poor Marx's mind to be split in a bloody and never-ending conflict between his "crappy bourgeois elitist" ego and his "romantic proletarian worker" other self, hence came his central theory of a "class struggle" governing the forces of History.īecause communism rejects property ownership and all property is held in common, it is the mortal enemy of Jews. As a matter of fact, Hegel, who was Marx's teacher, implanted a twin-personality schizophrenic disorder into Marx's mind before exploding, while laughing at his latest feat, in a fatal blow of TNT stuck in his anus by his frustrated student Friedrich Nietzsche. Communism can also be traced to Georg Hegel who, while not being political, planted ideas of opposites fighting into Karl Marx's head. Sadly, all currently existing communist organizations (which are not really communist organizations really) must be feeling pretty pissed off that they are not protected from being destroyed by imperialist groups, many of which, like the United States, are totally stupid.Ĭommunist philosophy can be traced back to the ancient writings of Proletariat (not to be confused with The proletariat, which also has connections with The Red Menace). It is a mistake to call Russia, China, North Korea, Vietnam or Cuba "communist", but a lot of uninformed idiots do. The political ideology|the Soviet political partyĬommunism is the perfect form of government, although many capitalists portray it as evil and exploitative.Ĭommunism has never existed, anywhere in the world. Use the official wiki, which has no vandalism and is kept up to date :)